Paralyzed by Happiness

I heard a story yesterday on This American Life. It was about a man and his positive emotions.

One day, while showering, he found himself unable to move and his body keeled over, leaving him paralyzed. He began telling himself to just "get up," willing himself to stand up like he knew he could. Finally after a few minutes he stood again and passed it off as a random occurrence.

But then the attacks began to happen daily, more than once a day, sometimes three times a day. Once he found himself lying in a bed of flowers for thirty minutes before he could move again. He began to seek medical advice, spoke with therapists and visited sleep doctors. Three years went by without a diagnosis. Until one day, he got one.

Narcolepsy with cataplexy. The cataplexy is what leaves him paralyzed. Researchers estimate that more than 1 Million people have this disease. While their is no cure and no reasoning for the cause, scientists have been able to find out what triggers the cataplexy.

Strong positive emotions. You know, things like...joy, happiness, laughter. Literally when he feels happy he becomes paralyzed.

Four years since his diagnosis and there is no end in sight. He has to daily learn to hold back positive emotions to keep from triggering an attack.

I thought about this for awhile. To go through life, hoping not to feel joy and hoping that when your wife holds your hand that your heart doesn't speed up. Or that when your children hug you so tightly and exclaim their love for you, that the overwhelming emotion doesn't cause you to collapse.

This last week leading up to the Feeding the Soul Foundation event for GenerateHope on Saturday, I found it extremely hard to sleep. I was too excited to sleep. Yes, I realize this puts me in the same category as six year-olds heading to Disneyland the next day. But I've been this way for as long as I can remember.

Laying in bed at night I begin to think of whatever exciting event is about to happen and my heart speeds up, my brain starts imagining the endless possibilities and my body feels as if it is ready to run a marathon. Typically, this means the next day you'll see a zombie in my place.

So, what if I couldn't experience joy or rather...was cautioned not to?

I can't imagine a life without the emotions of happiness. Have you ever considered the lack of those emotions and the blessings that they are in your life? The act of your heart feeling love or a song bringing back fond memories...you'd have to go without those experiences in order to keep from an attack.

Thinking about all this I decided I probably would have been paralyzed all week if I were that man. Just a 27-year-old girl lying on her bed hoping to wait out her positive emotions.

The event proved another success by the beautiful team at Feeding the Soul Foundation. I was thankful to hear Tristan Prettyman speak on behalf of GenerateHope and share her heart with her vulnerable songs. The Makepeace Brothers wooed the crowd as we danced and Finian Makepeace shared his passion for helping those who have been trafficked in the world.

This past weekend I was overwhelmed with joy. Over 250 people came out to support us and our cause. People spent their time, money and efforts to put on an event that would benefit a new house for the women at GenerateHope. Pure joy.

Have you laughed today? Thought about a new crush? Kissed your husband? Maybe you should consider that for a minute. And then, take a minute to thank God that you are not paralyzed every time this happens. Because life is good and our sweaty palms and beating hearts are daily reminders of this.

The musicians at the FTSF event, photo by www.laurenalissephotography.com.